Mental Happiness Wrapped in a Bow

Mental Health specifically Suicidal Ideation is very complex and one that can’t be easily identified

It’s unfortunate that many people during the 21st Century are facing numerous hardships affecting their mental health and the question is “Why Now and Why so Often?”

Suicide does not target race, gender, class nor intellectual abilities. This is an epidemic that is experienced amongst the most prestigious, influential, prominent, resilient and exuberant of them all.

From the teacher in the classroom, the doctor you’ve entrusted with your health and well being, the neighbor you’ve lived next door to for over 15 years, the pastor feeding you the word of God every Sunday morning,  the husband/wife that you’ve grown to love and built a family with, a college and or high school student with a bright future, astonishing athletic and academic abilities.

Most importantly, that individual we all consider “Strong Friend.” The one whom we go through life with.  The Strong Friend who always breathes life into you, the one that gives you oxygen to live (words of encouragement) the one who's always accessible. He/she has become your family, the godmother or godfather of your children, the maid of honor or best man in your wedding, your chef, your lender, your nurse, leader, never complains, is compelled with a loving smile and soft laughter.  The one that wears many hats in the friendship. 

Overall,  Strong Friend never responds with a NO nor I CAN’T.  Ultimately, he or she is God’s Gift Wrapped in a Bow. The person who solves everyone else’s problem and tends to forget solely about themselves. It's unfortunate Strong friend'' has become disposal, no longer useful and is composed as waste dumped in a landfill. 

So take into account every adjective above in which I’ve just described about this person and ask yourself -

Which one are you?

Do you see yourself in this light? 

Are you the rock or the sponge? 

Suicidal Ideation comes from many different angles. However, the one thing they have in common is people are left with nothing else to give. They are empty and their cups are in dire need to be filled. Their mind is in complete turmoil and they are left with the question exactly “Am I worthy of this Life”  

These individuals are the ones that society glorifies as being “strong and independent”. Strong people are not vulnerable enough to admit when they're low.

So my suggestion to you is to STOP having high expectations of people. It comes off as very intimidating at times. They are programmed to remain strong 110% at all times. Identified as someone without flaws. 

We are not designed to live our lives as if it was a picture perfect painting by the great Picasso himself. 

We are all worthy of making mistakes. The reality is most of us are “perfectly imperfect people” revising our lives on a daily basis.  Our mental and physical being in a natural state says, we are not equipped to handle life alone. Oftentimes, we do need to separate, but not necessarily isolate. 

On the contrary, isolation is needed in our lives for a time or two. “Why”? Because being in a place of exclusion helps you to be filled of your empty cup. I honestly can say my spiritual growth has allowed me to renew my thought process and cleanse my inner being time and time again. Suicidal ideation occurs because individuals does not have complete control of their mind. One struggles tremendously in order to open up about their trauma and or fears because people consequently use that same trauma as WEAPONS to fight them back with.  Specifically on MAD DAY.  Imagine yourself alone in a boxing ring and your opponents are the same weapons and trauma staring right back at you. If this is all so true, I personally would keep my pain in complete disguise, why would I orchestrate a fight and the invitee is myself. 

Sometimes wounds are so deeply rooted and graphically exposed, not even a bandaid is a treatment option for healing. The wound continues to get deeper and darker. The wound is now necrotic, consumed with dead tissue and there's no other option but amputation; the loss of a limb. 

In conclusion, let’s vow to become better listeners, more compassionate, less judgemental and better problem solvers. 

Letter to Strong Friend,

You are worthy, you were created in this world in the image of the almighty, someone is rooting for you, you are needed, you are valuable, you are loved, you are resourceful, you are a winner, greatness shall chase you for a lifetime, your assigned tribe will find you, your gifts shall overflood you, your smile lights up every room you enter, never give up, persevere, break down strongholds and write a story you never want it to end.  Simply just ask the question “Are you okay?”

With Gratitude,

Tricia Toussaint, RN BSN x Aura’ By Le’ Toussaint 

Christina Kelson, RN BSN  (co- writer on this article)

Disclaimer: we are not licensed Psychiatrists. If you are having thoughts of Suicide please seek immediate Medical Treatment. Please call the Suicide and Crisis Hotline at 9-8-8